A Colored White Girl

A Colored White Girl

When I was younger my differences were brought to my attention by the race of people I was told I belonged to

Before then I had no sense of skin tones and what the hell melanin was

I begin to compare

And before then I had no sense of self awareness

But here I was stepping into my new light surrounded in darkness

AloneWith no reason for being treated with such rudeness


Left alone to purposely be forgotten

My skin wasn’t chocolate so I wasn’t black

I was white by default

Nobody likes a white girl at a black school who seemingly excels in her white privilege

But I had none of that

I was far from that

Even though in my eyes I had hair just like them

They didn’t see that

Even though my parents were brown unlike me they didn’t see that

Even though I listened to the 90s hits

Jammed to blues at a bar with my black relatives

They didn’t see that

I was born black and yet because my skin was as yellow as the sun I couldn’t be black

They threw stones at me like I had been sentenced to death

Slowly I lost sight of my right to be here

To be loved

To know what it was I did so wrong to deserve such torment

I was meant to perish

Without understanding of why I couldn’t be different

I was white to them and a colored girl to the people they hated


A white colored girl


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