I am sorry I didn’t love me enough
But I was broken
Torn in pieces from those who tore from me the things they didn’t likeOne day someone said perfect
I didn’t believe them
I thought in their eyes I could see them laughing
I guess the joke was on me uh
I miss those parts of me
I let them go undone because to me they weren’t capable of being loved
I tried to paint on many faces
The mirror reflecting something so many said they admired and lusted
But not me
For a long time I forgot what my face looked like and she forgot who I was
Disassociated because together that meant I needed to acknowledge misplaced love
I’m sorry I didn’t love me enough
I searched for a place to dump my pain because it hurt too much
Eventually I stopped crying
My eyes forgot how to well up when the emoceans rose like waves in the abyss of my soul
Love was a lost interest
Falling to the depths of the waters
I rose
Ascending away
Seeking nirvana in the pain of others
I think he caught a glimpse one time
It hit his soul and he couldn’t stay so he stumbled to a place to bury his soul
I dug it up
Relentlessly torturing those who suffered like I was
I love my love but sometimes it’s easier to neglect my heart when it is feeling
To abandon what connects me to god feels better in the midst of the dirty work being done
I’m no saint just beautifully broken trying to heal what I thought I lost
2 responses to “Day Seven: Beautifully Broken”
Wow!! I love it. Somehow today it felt quite relatable to me. Thank you for sharing this. It’s beautiful.
Thank you! Yes when I wrote it that’s exactly how I felt. It made completed what I was feeling. You’re welcome!
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